Tuesday my husband and two of my children took off for a week in Tennessee to visit relatives. My husband fretted and worried during the entire planning stage of this trip. What if something happens to me while I'm gone? How will you (me and the kids) make do? Do I really want to take two kids? What if, what if, what if... Of course, I just gently prodded him along reassuring him that the chance that he'd die in a plane crash or in a sudden winter storm was very unlikely, and even if he did, I am more than capable of taking care of things in his absence. I urged him to go and spend time with his brother. The kids would love seeing their cousins, and it was only a week, after all.
My husband hates traveling. He claims that he does not like being away from home and family. I never really understood that, especially in light of the fact that whenever he's around home and family he's usually in a grumpy mood. At times I wonder why he comes home from work at all. He seems happier at work than at home. And family vacations are sheer torture!
The funny thing was my husband actually suggested that ALL of us go to Tennessee. I had to restrain myself from laughing when he said it. Was he serious? I very gently reminded him that every time we go on vacation together, or even just out to dinner as a family, he always says the same thing: "Next time I suggest we do something or go somewhere as a family, remind me not to!" So I reminded him. "Honey," I said with a smile, "if we all go to Tennessee, WE will all have a great time, but YOU will be miserable."
So he only took two kids. Turns out the nine year old threw up on the plane - more than once. Mind you, in seventeen years of marriage my husband has never handled our children's vomit. Claiming a weak stomach, he usually steps out of the room and leaves me to handle the clean-up. I don't mind. We mothers have very strong stomachs. So, I have to admit I felt just the slightest twinge of satisfaction at hearing the news that my dear husband had to clean up after my son on the plane - and that he took it all in stride. Bravo!
All in all, I must admit that there was an underlying reason for my staying home while he went off to play in the Tennessee snow. While my husband hates to spend time away from the family - I LOVE IT!!!! Yep, Tuesday morning I kissed my husband and children good-bye, told them I love them and would miss them, and stood outside to watch them drive away. The moment they were out of sight I did a little dance, started singing to myself, and listed all the wonderful things I would enjoy in their absence: having my bed all to myself, throwing out whatever I want without having to justify it to anyone, watching a few movies without interruption, and going anywhere I please - again, without having to justify it to anyone! Heaven!
So here I am, oddly enough, watching my twelve-year-old sleeping soundly - in my bed. (My two teens and the toddler are home with me.) No, I didn't get my bed all to myself after all. And though I did watch two movies last night, I did it with my two year old jumping all over me and my son asking questions every two minutes. And I did take off on a spontaneous trip to Arizona, which made my husband furious when he found out and I still had to justify it, and it's day four of the Tennessee trip and I have nothing really to show for it. Well, that's not entirely true. I did throw out an old dresser and a broken high chair - and I didn't have to justify that to anyone!
Friday, January 8, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A New Beginning
It's been nine months since my last blog - and for good reason... Well, two reasons really. The first was that my husband wasn't too keen on my making public the details of our personal lives, exposing ourselves (or more specifically our children) to negative comments by complete strangers. The second reason was nothing more than good old fashioned laziness.
As for the first reason, I have told myself over and over that if Erma Bombeck had shielded her family from possible public criticism, then America would have missed out on a lot of good laughs. How I love Erma Bombeck! When I was in high school, one of my teachers wrote me a note predicting that I would be the next Erma Bombeck. Well, at least her compliment gave me enough courage to continue writing for the next twenty-five years.
As for the second reason, I admit to using my new status as "mother of five" as an excuse to do nothing...well, at least very little...lately. Does that make sense?
Two years ago at the age of 39, I gave birth to my fifth and final child. I have enjoyed every single moment since then! I have learned that the years pass way too fast while our children are young, and not fast enough once they reach adolesence. So, I have been savoring every second with little Jare Bear.
And there is, actually, one more reason why I've been so lazy. I've been living in writer's limbo. Limbo, as most of you know, is the place where souls go to wait. It is neither heaven nor hell, and nothing of any significance is accomplished there. Souls just sort of drift along waiting for...something, anything, to happen.
Well, that's where I've been. You see, when a writer is actually writing (and I mean working hard on a specific project) the world is a wonderful place. In fact, hours and days are much too short. It is easy to lose oneself in it all. The experience of writing, and especially of actually FINISHING a project, is absolutely delicious! Then there's the stage of hoping, and praying, and dreaming for publication. Submitting is hard work, too, and it can be all consuming. The rejections are tough to take, but a good writer never gives up.
All this is just fine and dandy. But then there's the stage that I've been in the past couple of years, the stage where publishers actually like what I've written and say they'd like to publish it -- but nothing happens for a long, long, long time. This stage is full of words like "soon" and "be patient" and "in a few more weeks" and "hang in there." It is extremely difficult to get any actual work done in this stage.
It's kind of like those last few weeks of pregancy when you know the baby could arrive at anytime, but there's no way to know for sure exactly when. You pace the floor day after day, look at the clock and the calendar a hundred times a day, and every thought in your head becomes consumed by everything baby.
That's what I've been going through ever since Tanglewood Press told me they wanted to publish my first novel. That was in June 2008. (I had submitted the manuscript in 2006.) I did manage to complete the first draft of the sequel and began writing the third book in the series, but I have had a dickens of a time doing much else -- other than playing with my little boy. Mabye God sent him to me when he did to help me fill my limbo time with something truly worthwhile.
Anyway, I am thrilled to say that my limbo time might be coming to an end...soon. Tanglewood contacted me, still loves my book, and is ready to begin the publishing process. This, of course, simply begins yet another stage in my life, one with which I am as yet unfamiliar. In the meantime, I hope to find a little more time to blog.
When it all boils down to it, I am still a haggard housewife trying to live my lifelong dream of becoming a published author. Thanks Erma Bombeck! You're still my inspiration!
As for the first reason, I have told myself over and over that if Erma Bombeck had shielded her family from possible public criticism, then America would have missed out on a lot of good laughs. How I love Erma Bombeck! When I was in high school, one of my teachers wrote me a note predicting that I would be the next Erma Bombeck. Well, at least her compliment gave me enough courage to continue writing for the next twenty-five years.
As for the second reason, I admit to using my new status as "mother of five" as an excuse to do nothing...well, at least very little...lately. Does that make sense?
Two years ago at the age of 39, I gave birth to my fifth and final child. I have enjoyed every single moment since then! I have learned that the years pass way too fast while our children are young, and not fast enough once they reach adolesence. So, I have been savoring every second with little Jare Bear.
And there is, actually, one more reason why I've been so lazy. I've been living in writer's limbo. Limbo, as most of you know, is the place where souls go to wait. It is neither heaven nor hell, and nothing of any significance is accomplished there. Souls just sort of drift along waiting for...something, anything, to happen.
Well, that's where I've been. You see, when a writer is actually writing (and I mean working hard on a specific project) the world is a wonderful place. In fact, hours and days are much too short. It is easy to lose oneself in it all. The experience of writing, and especially of actually FINISHING a project, is absolutely delicious! Then there's the stage of hoping, and praying, and dreaming for publication. Submitting is hard work, too, and it can be all consuming. The rejections are tough to take, but a good writer never gives up.
All this is just fine and dandy. But then there's the stage that I've been in the past couple of years, the stage where publishers actually like what I've written and say they'd like to publish it -- but nothing happens for a long, long, long time. This stage is full of words like "soon" and "be patient" and "in a few more weeks" and "hang in there." It is extremely difficult to get any actual work done in this stage.
It's kind of like those last few weeks of pregancy when you know the baby could arrive at anytime, but there's no way to know for sure exactly when. You pace the floor day after day, look at the clock and the calendar a hundred times a day, and every thought in your head becomes consumed by everything baby.
That's what I've been going through ever since Tanglewood Press told me they wanted to publish my first novel. That was in June 2008. (I had submitted the manuscript in 2006.) I did manage to complete the first draft of the sequel and began writing the third book in the series, but I have had a dickens of a time doing much else -- other than playing with my little boy. Mabye God sent him to me when he did to help me fill my limbo time with something truly worthwhile.
Anyway, I am thrilled to say that my limbo time might be coming to an end...soon. Tanglewood contacted me, still loves my book, and is ready to begin the publishing process. This, of course, simply begins yet another stage in my life, one with which I am as yet unfamiliar. In the meantime, I hope to find a little more time to blog.
When it all boils down to it, I am still a haggard housewife trying to live my lifelong dream of becoming a published author. Thanks Erma Bombeck! You're still my inspiration!
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